I’m so excited about the increase in blog viewers/readers. I hope I haven’t missed anybody’s comments. I thank you so much for those that have stopped by to say hi and give me a follow.
Today marks 29 weeks since I had my Vertical Sleeve Gastrectomy weight loss surgery (VSG). I had surgery on April 30, 2018 at St. Mary’s Hospital in Grand Rapids MI with my surgeon Dr. Randal Baker. He works out of Grand Health Partners also in Grand Rapids. I started at a pre-op weight of 355 pounds. Today, I weighed in at 271.8 for a total loss of 83.2 pounds! My loss for this past week is 2.8 pounds. I’m really happy with that. My BMI started at 62.9 and is currently at 48.1. I think that’s pretty good progress.
I haven’t been taking good measurements as I probably should, but I’ve noticed that there have been inches lost. My bras and underwear are too big! My pajama pants are falling off me. I can fit into some clothes that didn’t fit me before!
I’ve been doing pretty good with the activity. I try to get out and walk a few times a week. I’m dreading the upcoming snow and winter months. But I really want to try to embrace them and get out and be active and take in nature as I can. I know my shopping job will take priority. And, it gets dark out a lot earlier now so I’ll have to schedule in my walks. I’m going to try to get out in the snow. It’ll depend on if I can find a warm jacket. You know, I used to hate summer. I was always so big and miserable. I would never wear shorts or go swimming so it was just a miserable time of year for me. The heat really got to me. This year, however, I LOVED summer. The lakeshore/beach became my happy place. Sunday nights, I would attend worship on the waterfront with my aunt and uncle. Following worship, we would stay for the musical fountains. It was the best time. Live worship music and then beautiful, colorful water fountains set to music. Perfect! I was so sad when the season ended. Technically, we’re still in the Fall season, but it’s been very cold, more winter-like.
This Thursday is Thanksgiving! I can’t even believe it. The holidays are creeping right up on us so quickly. I’m really trying to be strong. I already know that I won’t be spending the day with my kids. Kara is working and then has plans that evening. Kayleigh is doing things with her boyfriend Jon’s family. So I am planning to go up north to spend it with my brother and his family. It’s going to be a very different day for me this year. But I think it’ll be better this year than it was last to be honest. Last year, even though my now ex hadn’t told me his feelings we didn’t do a traditional dinner at the house. He didn’t want to cook like we had always done in the past. He had steak I think. I don’t remember what Kara did. I made my own little turkey roast and I made a corn casserole that nobody but me ate. Then he went out Uber driving. I was left alone for the evening. I remember being so hurt and alone. Why couldn’t I see what was happening? Why was I in the dark?
I’m sitting here in tears now reliving the memories from when I worked so hard on the relationship way back in 2005 when he initially cheated. Why didn’t I see then that I was the one working and he wasn’t putting as much effort in? I’m the one that went to counseling, he had no interest. Why didn’t I listen to my therapist then all those times when she said “why do you put up with that?” “Dorothy!!!” I sometimes wonder what my life would be like right now had I been a stronger person back then. But I just couldn’t see myself being a single mom. I was so incredibly afraid to be a single mom. Plus, my own mom was knocking on death’s door. I couldn’t fathom two losses so close. My kids were in middle school at the time. I can’t believe it’s been 13 years since those initial events. Sometimes I can’t believe I’m divorced. But then I think, it was for the best. God knows what’s best for me even though this year has been what feels like the worst. I have gained so much inner strength. I’m a completely different woman from what I was. It really is like night and day.
I just received news that a former coworkers daughter passed away on the 15th. She was only 35. I’ll be attending the funeral tomorrow. I hope I can handle it emotionally. May God be with the family during this time of grief.
I’m going to end it here. I’m feeling a bit down at the moment and think I’m going to cuddle with the dogs a bit and curl up in a blanket because I’m actually cold again. I am always cold!
Wherever you are in this world, I wish you peace, love and happiness!
❤ Dottie May